Cover sleeve
Write Screenplays That Sell - the Ackerman Way : by Hal Ackerman, $19.95 (Tallfellow Press, 1180 S. Beverly Drive, Los Angeles CA 90035 - www.Tallfellow.com)
There are as many books on how to write successful screenplays as there are unsuccessful screenwriters. It seems that if you find you CAN'T write successful screenplays, the next best thing is to write a book telling other people how to succeed where you yourself have failed. There is always a market for this, which I shall be proving next month with the release of my epic tome How To Win An Oscar For Best Screenplay By Next Year (A tenner from a plastic bag down the pub).
Needless to say, there's a finite amount of advice that anyone can give on creative writing, as writing to formula only produces derivative and dull work (yes, Guy Ritchie, that means you). However, there are certain fundamental rules that can reduce the amount of time wasted and it never hurts to get a grasp on the concepts of structure, tone, theme and format.
For those of you who don't have the attention span to finish this review, let alone read a whole book, here are Ackerman's salient points:
- Anyone can write a screenplay, but you have to stop talking about it and actually finish the damn thing to get anywhere.
- Format it properly if you want to be taken seriously.
- Your screenplay has to have a story, characters, structure, and preferably a point.
- Conflict. Conflict. Conflict.
- Screenwriting is unlikely to pay for a Ferrari. Don't give up the day job.
There's a fair amount of random waffle in this book, but it's written anecdotally in a chatty informal style, which makes it entertaining and easy to read, although there is a decided surplus of metaphor. The important points are conveyed clearly and placed in a relevant context, with examples taken from films that are mainstream enough for the aspiring writer to borrow from a mate instead of ordering from an obscure Slovenian distributor with premises in a converted abattoir in Hackney.
Readability is a key factor in books like this, as anyone who has ever attempted to plough through Robert McKee's Story will attest to. There will be many moments where you mutter, "Aaah.." as a particularly hard-to-grasp technicality is finally explained in a simple way in words of no more than two syllables. Anything particularly important is helpfully printed in bold, ideal for the skimmer, and Ackerman's "can do" attitude is refreshing and inspirational. The addendum, The Ackerman Way on the title, shows a degree of humility that is rare in books of this sort. It's more common to assert "the only way".
On the down side, it's American, so there are lots of the ubiquitous homework exercises and twee contracts with yourself that everyone always sneers at and ignores. But, at least, there is a tangible point to these. They're useful. If you can be bothered doing them, of course. Which is ultimately the reason why most people fail to Write Screenplays That Sell.
If you want to write badly enough, you will. And the more you write, the better you will get. Keep trying, keep learning and you have as much chance as anyone else of seeing your work on screen one day. Otherwise, you will grow wrinkly and lonely, as friends feign illness to avoid yet another bitter diatribe about why the industry has failed to recognise your genius and pay you a million quid for a half-written script with no punctuation.
If you're in the market for a "how to" guide on screenwriting, this is one of the best out there. It's practical, fun to read and even the diagrams make sense. Ackerman understands about procrastination and he can't MAKE you write, but he makes you want to.
