Hellboy

Hellboy is a giant red monster employed by the FBI to protect humanity. When Rasputin comes back from the dead, along with his Nazi cohorts(?!), it's up to Hellboy to save mankind, through a series of repetitive one-on-one fistfights.

The standard excuse for such hokum is that it's unpretentious comic book fare and therefore shouldn't be judged by normal standards. It's a view the BBFC seems to share, granting this ludicrously violent film a 12A certificate.

Perhaps they found it impossible to follow, as the plot makes no sense at any point. After the scene in which Hellboy tearfully mourns his father's death, we learn that he has the power to raise the dead. Right...

Hellboy is a loud, boring film, too violent for kids, too stupid for grown-ups.

Why is it that whenever people talk about comic books, they never mean The Beano?